Just over a month ago, I had to go back to work after having my baby girl. My leave this time around was over 10 weeks. It felt like a long time and no time at all. How does two and a half months go by that quickly? I knew it was coming, but that doesn’t make coming back any easier.
Before the big day I had time to prepare and discuss a few things with the substitute who was there while I was gone (who was fantastic and made things go so smoothly!). I developed a few lessons and even found a few review games for my students.
The kids day care bags were packed, forms signed, and schedules planned. Meals cooked in advance for easy dinners were ready in the freezer. I was ready on the outside.
How’s It Going?
People have been asking me, “How’s it going being back?” Well, that depends. How is it going leaving the two beings I love most in the world every Monday through Friday to the care of others? How is it going being away from them more than 40 hours a week throughout the school year? How is it going knowing that you will only have a few hours with them when you come home, but all that other home “stuff” that is pulling at my time? How is it going, knowing that I may be missing important milestones, missing smiles and laughs, or missing cuddles when they are sad? How do I answer that?
At the same time, I enjoy what I do. I like making lessons exciting for my students. There is a thrill in putting together an activity that will demonstrate exactly the point students need to know AND be one they continue talking about for the next few days. It’s awesome to see that light bulb moment for someone in the middle of class, especially from someone that normally struggles. I like joking with the kids in their awkward but endearing ways. The teasing, the lame puns, and silly talk. The students make me smile, cause frustration, laughs, and tears. This is why I do what I do.
So, how is it going? It’s going. It’s going because this is where God wants me to be right now. I know my place is to be at the school I am at, working with the kids I do. God has given me peace about the decision my husband and I made about our work situation. He has given me skills, that right now, I’m called to use in the workplace. Maybe in the future, he will call me to use those skills as a stay at home mom. Or maybe he won’t. But whatever happens, I know that God will keep me going and continue to give me peace as long as I am where he wants me to be.
I know many other of you moms are in similar positions. Maybe you need to work for financial reasons, or insurance reasons. Or both. Maybe you worked so hard for your degree (and have so many student loans) that you feel like this is the only option right now. Maybe you just love what you do so much, that you can’t imagine not working. There are so many reasons that moms have to leave their precious babies everyday.
Or maybe some of you moms are at home, worried about finances because you aren’t working, feeling overwhelmed because you feel like you never have time to yourself and can’t even get a few minutes to go to the bathroom without little ones peeking under the door (It IS nice to be able to use the restroom in peace again, even if I only have a few seconds in between passing periods!). Maybe you selflessly gave up a career you adored to take care of your family.
It’s Going “Good”
Whatever situation you are in, trust that God knows where you need to be. I encourage you to continually seek out God for his plan, because God’s plans are greater than ours. He knows whether you need to be teaching other people’s precious babies. He knows if you need to be home with your own babies (no matter how old those babies are!). And if you are unsure of where you need to be, just ask Him!
So when people ask me “How is it going?”, I can simply say “Good.” God is good, and though life is a little crazy right now, my life is in Good hands.